Religious Poetry (limericks, to be exact)

When God saw human love grow stark,

Our forecast was cloudy and dark.

          “The beasts I will spare

          Of each just a pair.”

Then hope rained, “Noah, build an ark.”

 

 

When Mary anointed Our Lord,

Judas grew angry and roared.

          But Jesus approved

          Of her efforts to soothe

And welcomed his tired reward.

 

 

Did God create our struggle with greed?

Craft the cancer of want versus need?

          For clearly free will

          Is no magic pill

Meant to cure this disease when we breed.

 

 

There once was a Pharisee named Saul,

Who persecuted Christians with gall.

        Then God struck him blind        

        And opened his mind,

So he could recognize his true call.

 

 

 

Before we got kicked out of Eden,

There were no worries about feeding.

        Then one apple bite,

        Made hunger our plight;

Forever to toil with planting and weeding.

 

 

There once lived a farmer named Cain

Who offered up to God some grain.

        But his brother won God’s praise

        So Cain slayed him in a craze

Forever cursed to till in vain.

 

 

People would beg Jesus to heal

And transform mere morsels to meals.

          He did all this and more

          For the rich and the poor

When he sensed their faith was for real.

 

 

As Jesus hung dying on a cross,

He looked down on a Roman coin toss.

          He said his goodbyes

          And let out a sigh

Knowing death was a win not a loss.

 

 

A woman was going to be bludgeoned

By a crowd self-righteous and judging.

          Jesus silenced the din

          Drawing dusty old sins,

And scattered every last curmudgeon.

                                          

 

There once was an angel who fell

For indulging dark ego’s spell.

          He got quite a jolt

          When he led a revolt

Forever, from heaven, expelled.

 

 

Whether we see God as mom or dad

Doesn’t likely make our parent mad.

          It’s just that we call

          As daily we fall

That would make our creator so glad.

 

 

Claiming that God is found in one holy book

Is the act of a selfish, closed-minded crook.

          For what our God taught

          Would all be for naught

If we fail to see Him wherever we look.

 

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